are certain areas of life where people tend to think that they or their friends
are stuck with "God's second best." We say that we believe Romans 8:28,
and yet when it comes to being single or childless, or handicapped in some way
it is so common for Christians to take the attitude that this is somehow not acceptable
- that something has gone wrong.
single myself, I have been burdened by the pressure that is put upon us singles
by other Christians at times. The match making, the comments, the urgency to marry
that are put upon us can make us frustrated, angry and confused. More than that,
they can tempt us to be discontent with what God has willed for our lives at this
contemplating this, the Lord directed my attention to those who are childless.
(I say childless rather than barren because there are some who, though they technically
may be able to bare children, may not do so for medical reasons.) In considering
this, it seemed that they are subjected to many similar problems. There are the
insensitive questions, the pushing, the "helpful suggestions." Some
will nag them to adopt. Again there is the urgency, in this case that it must
be God's will for all married people to have children. And again, these things
can tempt to discontent, can frustrate and cause anger.
marred flower smells as sweet,
Its nectar is for honey meet,
show God's artist hand;
'Tis only yet despised by man.
recently it has seemed appropriate to add those who suffer from physical or mental
limitations to this section. This is also an area of "second best" in
many people's thinking. The parents of children who are born with such difficulties
often have a hard time coming to terms with what God has allowed for them and
their child. At the same time, those who become physically disabled later in life
or were born that way, may face many of the same difficulties in accepting God's
will and having peace that the single and childless among us have. Hence, some
effort to include them here should be made.
More than all
of this, for those of us that are in these positions, there is the battle with
our own flesh. There are the inner wrestlings that overwhelm - the "whys"
and doubts that threaten at times to drown us. Can there be no peace or rest for
us? Isaiah 53:4 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried
our sorrows... And again, Hebrews 4:15 For we have
not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities;
but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. 16 Let us
therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and
find grace to help in time of need.
55:8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways
my ways, saith the LORD. 9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than
your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.